The Questionnaire, Part 9

Have you ever seen a stripper or been to a strip club? Yes. M and I spent a very fun Saturday night up in San Francisco. I had been before, but neither of us had been with a partner. There was one girl in particular that appealed to both of us. We had lap dances from her and fantasized about fucking her together. It was a very sensual evening and I enjoyed it very much. I’d like to go with a lover again. Just the titillation factor alone, if both parties are enthusiastic and creative, would be more than worth the cover charge.

Have you ever committed an act of exhibitionism (moon, streak, flash)? No mooning, no streaking. Flashing is fun though, although I admit I haven’t done it in quite some time. I’m not sure any of those – in the context of them being the same thing as each – really say ‘exhibitionism’ to me though – it seems more prankish. To me, exhibitionism is nudity – full, partial, or slight – in public for the purpose of sexual enticement or excitement. Now, if you were to ask me if I like to be with a partner who enjoys brief flashes of skin in public for the purpose of seduction? Yes. That I do like. And that, I would do *grin

Have you ever committed an act of voyeurism? Have I watched someone fuck or masturbate? Yes. But I think that they’ve always known about it. I don’t think I’ve ever watched anyone engage in sexuality without their knowledge, though that might be fun *grin

If you had a choice as to how often you would have sex, how often would it be? I don’t suppose I can get away with “it depends” here, can I? But it really does. Am I with a partner? If so, then I would like to have some sort of sexual contact every day. Whether that entails fucking or oral sex or just plain making out on the couch is up for grabs, but I like to connect with a lover on a sexual level at least once a day. I think that if you don’t necessarily fuck every day, but do other things instead – even something as simple as shopping for lingerie – it keeps passion alive.

Do you currently have or have you had in the past a friend with benefits, fuck buddy or other regular casual sex partner? I have had three. I have one now, have had for about a year. The ones I had in the past lasted anywhere from three months to five years (off and on). Each of them has been completely different. Fuck buddy relationships can be tricky. If this is someone you are truly friends with, lines are much easier to cross, and it’s difficult to remember sometimes what the relationship is. The best ones leave room for both activities without them taking away from the other. There are different levels of casual (see my recent post on casual vs. nonchalant), and each relationship has to be defined by both people, often more than once. But having sex with someone you truly like and would spend time with outside the bedroom? That’s a pretty cool thing to have in your life.

Have you ever been taught or had someone demonstrate a new sexual act for you in order to better your sexual skills? I don’t think so, outside of the BDSM community.

Do you keep a change of clothes in your vehicle for unexpected overnight visits? No. If I had a local lover, maybe I would be I don’t, so this would just leave me looking for whatever I packed in the bag *grin.