The Questionnaire, Part 10

Would you consider intimately sharing your mate with a friend for purely educational purposes? I think that’d depend on the activity and the people involved. Would I let a friend suck his cock so she could learn how? Sure, if I get to play, too *grin

Have you ever had an audience of strangers watch you perform intimate acts? Yes, at the swinger’s club. To be honest, after the first few minutes, I forgot that they were there. I’m not sure I feel about it on a deeper level. I know that at the club it was fine, but then again, I wasn’t there because it was my fantasy; it was M’s.

Have you ever participated in a bukkake party (several men ejaculating on a woman)? No. That doesn’t really appeal to me. There’s no sort of connection to the men who are jacking off on you, and it’s a purely fetish thing I think. Not my fetish, but someone’s fetish.

Have you ever masturbated while on webcam for others to watch? No. Actually, I just bought my very first webcam this week. I’m not crazy about the quality, but I didn’t spend much either. I just wanted one to play with a little. Will I use it for this purpose? I’m not thinking so. But then again you never know, do you? The idea of it is pretty hot, but because I’m still not 100% where body confidence is concerned I’m not sure if I’d feel inhibited or not. I might surprise myself.

Do you like resistance play where you're holding or being held down and struggling to get free during sex? I like to be held down, yes. And as it turns out, I also like the idea of holding a lover down sometimes. It’s a little empowering to push a man down onto a bed and climb on top of him. Now typically it’s not like he’s going to resist that *grin but at the point you place your hand on his chest and push, do you really care if he’s resisting or not? I don’t know how I’d feel about being resisted but I certainly do enjoy taking the lead sometimes. As far as the other side, fuck yes I like to be held down and I like to resist physically even though my heart is never in it. I like to fight it. I like to wrestle around. I like to be overpowered. For so many years, I was heavier than my lovers for the most part. I liked the idea of being weaker at that point. But now that’s not necessarily the case anymore. My desire to resist hasn’t weakened a bit though. *grin

Have you ever used 'dirty talk' with a partner while having sex? Are you kidding? Yes. Yes, yes, yes. This adds to my sexual experience so much I cannot even begin to tell you. Nor can I tell you why exactly, but I’m kind of past the point of caring about why. Every sexual experience does not need to have this but the more of it I get, the harder I seem to get off. Typically for most of my experience it’s either been words based on the act that was being performed (being called a good little cocksucker can be a very very good thing *smirk) or it’s been names that most people would consider derogatory or downright rude, and that for some reason make me melt into a little whimpering mess. But there are other things too, and the other night while talking with a friend I discovered that using the names in conjunction with a remark about my behavior – as if being chastised – amps the entire thing up to a different level. If I’m in a more submissive mindset for whatever reason, that really moves me along to a different place and I find myself a little lost in it. It’s like being called a ‘bad girl’ when I’m in the mood to be a bad girl. It’s like having that acknowledged in some wild, deep sexy way and …yum. Dirty talk for me is not a requirement but it certainly is a desire in a big way.