A peg or two

A Peg or Two

I’ve had a bdsm website that I’ve had up and maintained for over 10 years (about 7 at it’s current web address). In those years, I’ve asked and answered a lot of questions, and discussed some of what it is we do til I’m blue in the face.

I tend to be a realist. Fluffy, cuddly rhetoric tends to annoy me when it’s flounced around like a bunny rabbit at Easter (ooo…did I just do that…yup, I did). Romance has its place – and I’m a dyed-in-the-wool romantic. But there are some things that should not *be* romanticized. There is a big ol’ sign at the start of my webpage that says “No Fluffy Cuddly Bullshit” and I mean it. You can pretty much be as romantic as you want to be. But in my life, it has a time and a place and when I’m being a brat is *not* the time.

When I’m being a brat, whether it’s conscious or subconscious; whether it’s me trying to provoke a dominant into pushing his limits as well as mine; whether it’s me just being my sweet-smart-ass self, that very last thing I want a dominant to do is be cuddly and sweet. If it’s out there, I want the dominant to show me in no uncertain terms that he hasn’t lost control of the situation.

Is that pushing? Is it limiting? Is it SAMming my ass off? Sure, it’s all of those things, but it’s none of them, too. I’m not trying to top from the bottom; I have no intention of winning a war of wills. I don’t *want* to win.

If I win, it’s done, and we have both lost.

I’m a strong-willed woman. One of the things that has always appealed to me about BDSM is the fact that there are times when it is appropriate for me to *not* be that. It is more than an escape; it’s a journey through a part of myself that I am only semi-comfortable with – the part that is allowed to let go.

I don’t hide this part of myself from any dominant I’m trying to get to know. I put it right out there in the open, so that it’s not a big surprise some day to him. My hope is that in my doing so, I’ll get to see some parts of him that he may not bring out and parade around in front of others.

I doubt that this is why *everyone* who acts a brat does it. We all have our reasons for pushing the buttons on the dominant’s control panel. But I like people to realize that there *is* a reason – at least for me. It is serving some kind of purpose, and it’s not just me bratting (yes, I do tend to use that word as a verb. Send the grammar police my way, especially if they have handcuffs) for the sake of bratting.

If you want it, take it. Let the brat be damned.

But she won’t be damned. She’ll be damn pleased with herself and probably very wet.

So, yes. Please. Knock me down a peg or two, if you have it in you, and it gets you off.

If not? Well, I’m sure there’s a quiet submissive kneeling in a corner just waiting for your call.