Sunday, July 26, 2009

Narrow but Deep


My mom started calling me skinny over the last couple of years. I don't like it, because I certainly do not feel skinny. Am I smaller than I have ever been? Yes. I am no longer 'plus size'? Certainly. But skinny? No. Not even close.

I have taken to saying that I am narrow, but deep *chuckle*

According to the picture to the left, I am between the men's ideal and the women's ideal. I do not feel remotely close to what that picture represents tho. Therein lies my biggest current issue. It's not that I have a bad self-image. It's that I have a confusing self-image.



A few weeks ago, when I was lamenting all of this to a friend of mine, he said very simply "You're not fat." My typical response would be to laugh or argue, but I tried very hard not to do that. Actually, I was trying so hard that I can't remember what my response was.

But right around that time was while I was in the midst of my Cathouse extravaganza. And in the first or second episode, it suddenly occurred to me that while the Bunny Ranch has it's share of very skinny women (See: Sunset Thomas, who was a "regular" there during the filming of the series and the documentary), the majority of these women are not "perfect bodies". And suddenly, I started to feel much less crappy about the issues I have with my body and even though I *knew* before that I was sexy at the size I am now -- I believe it a little more now.

None of those women -- the non-barbie doll ones -- seemed to have one issue with how she looked in a seemingly endless parade of lingerie throughout each episode. They looked sexy, because they displayed confidence -- and you could almost feel how sexy each felt they were. And you know, typically when I put on lingerie, I feel that way, too. It's only when I'm getting dressed in real clothes that I have issues. *chuckle* Trust me to be the weird one.

So I'm not skinny but I am sexy. I'm narrow through the hips but deeper than I'd like.

And all in all, I need to really stop being so damn hard on myself.

I'm getting there.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Cathouse


I finally got around to watching Cathouse earlier this month. I watched the first 2 seasons (well, season and a half) plus the original documentatry.



I was intrigued for most of it, and made several notes during watching it of things I wanted to explore further by writing about them. All in all, I think it was a good time, and while there were several of the girls that irritated me to no end, there was one that I especially enjoyed watching.








Isabella Soprano is not only cute, and pretty much looks like the all American girl, but she reminded me a lot of ME in the way she spoke, explored different sexual activities, and strove to teach other people what she'd learned. I really enjoyed watching her, and was disappointed in the episodes she wasn't included in.



As I said, I made a lot of notes about things I want to explore here, that I saw discussed or... well, shown *grin* in the series, but I did want to make a general post about the series as well.

I don't think I care for Dennis Hof, the owner/operator of The Moonlite Bunny Ranch, where the series was filmed, all that much, but it's obvious that he's very good at what he does, and I do think that he has a genuine caring for most of the girls at the Ranch. There were some things he said and did that rubbed me the wrong way is all. Some of the girls also got on my last nerve, but some of them like Isabella and Shelly really were fun to watch.

I'm glad, though, that I did get the series from Netflix rather than buying it. It's a good one-time watch, but not something I'd probably watch again and again.

All in all, I'd give it an 8/10. If you're looking for cinematography tho, skip it. It's mostly filmed like a cheap documentary.

You should know this ....


Here's a quote from the book I was waxing about here: Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex ...

"Strangely enough, the list of ingredients in semen look a lot like the label on a bottle of vitamin pills. Semen contains at least two vitamins: Vitamin C and Vitamin B12. It also contains important minerals, including calcium, potassium, magnesium, phosphorus and zinc. It contains two sugarlike substances: fructose and sorbitol. It is also very high in protein. That makes it, in addition to it's other obvious qualities, an excellent nutritional supplement. But it won't replace a balanced diet. It's important to note that semen is also high in cholesterol and sodium, and for those who should avoid these substances, caution is indicated."

I laughed hard when I read that. I'm guessing the author had to be laughing, too.

He goes on later to say that it also contains about 15 calories a "serving".

Good reasons to seek or avoid swallowing though, if you're looking for reasons or excuses *smirk*