Imagine

There are lots of things that go into a good sexual experience. Technique of course is important. Sexual chemistry, of course. The ability to be spontaneous. The confidence to take chances. All of these things go into making a sexual experience fun, passionate and memorable.

There’s something else though, that very often gets overlooked. Imagination.

You can have the best technique in the world – a quick tongue, agile hands and hips that move perfectly. But if you don’t have the imagination to back that up, you’re going to get boring quickly.

You have to change things up sometimes. Even subtle alterations can make a big difference in a typical fuck and an outstanding fuck.

Being completely in the moment helps. Following your instincts and letting yourself carry out things that come into your head (that you believe your partner will enjoy that is) is part of it, too. Being brave enough to actually do those silly, sexy, passionate things that come into your head can mean the difference between getting off big and just getting off.

Imagination doesn’t have to mean that every sexual encounter is a big production with costumes and toys (although that’s fun, too). It means that you’re willing to expend some extra energy – that you’re confident, that you’re open to new things, that you’re willing to explore and drag your partner along with you. It means that sometimes it’s not enough to ‘go with the flow’. Not enough for you, not enough to make the event special.

And I am a firm believer in making sex special *grin

I have a big imagination. I don’t think that’s a surprise to anyone. When I’m comfortable and confident in bed, I’m able to make up for a lack of imagination in my partner. Sometimes.

But the fact is that I feed off of feedback from my partner, too. I want to see facial expressions and I want to hear guttural noises from deep in his throat when he’s having a good time. When I have physical manifestations of sexual pleasure on display before me, my creativity level can soar. Because that feedback makes me want to work even harder and see just how much I can wring out of him before it’s over.

*grin

It’s good to have imagination. It’s even better to exercise it, and use it.

Find some.