Suffer

"I've done wrong, and I want to suffer for my sins." Criminal, Fiona Apple

I once had a man, who may perhaps be a dominant someday, say to me -- "Suffer for me. It's strangely arousing."

Frankly, I found the sentiment of that phrase strangely arousing myself and it stuck in my mind for a very long time afterward.

What about suffering is arousing? Why do so many submissive women look forward to being put into awkward, often painful situations? Why is it that the more we suffer, the more submissive we think we become?

Is it pride? love? fear? What's the motivation? If we suffer enough, it proves our devotion and/or love? It shows we are not afraid?

Not that it matters, of course. It's the simple fact that it gets us off that is enough.

I miss being challenged in that regard. I miss being challenged, period.